Full Moon

I pace around my room frustrated. Sleep has deluded me again. This has become so common now that I have started to think I have some sort of sleeping disorder. I have tried everything to get back to sleep… I have even popped a pain killer to fall asleep. But nothing worked and here I am pacing around in the middle of the night.

The room feels so stuffed and suffocating. I decide to get some fresh air. I tip-toe to balcony keeping in mind not to wake others. I close the door from outside and let out a sigh. The night is lovely… the cool breeze is blowing gently. The sky is clear and beautiful with a full moon and stars. I look at the sky and marvel its beauty. In vain I try to focus on the full moon but my mind starts drifting to my clouded thoughts… the thoughts that have been haunting me since the day my best friend got married… a week ago.

Hers was a fairytale love story… the kinds on which the movies are based. She had a crush on her sister’s best friend. That crush turned to infatuation and then finally in to love. The feelings were mutual. He proposed and they had been together for 5 years.  In the beginning of this year they both decided it’s high time they made it official. They spoke to their parents and their parents had no problem with it. Why would they? They both belonged to caste and community. On top of it the pundits has said that it was a match made in heaven. Today they have flown to Maldives for their honeymoon. But not every love story is a fairytale… certainly mine isn’t.

Fours years ago I met him. It wasn’t love at 1st site or anything, infact I remember thinking that he was the most the arrogant and rude guy I have ever met. We were acquaintances at first. That turned into friendship and within no time we were in love. None of us can exactly point out when we fell in love. We have different stories and we disagree with each other. The saying ‘opposites attract’ is certainly true in our case. He isn’t the Prince Charming that I have always dreamed of but he is what I need. I think we both have been destined to be together. No one else could make us feel the way we feel about each other. We make each go through every emotion that is known to man. We are perfect for each other and we love each other more than anything/one in the world. But we don’t belong to the same caste and that’s a bigger problem than anyone can imagine.

Seven years ago my cousin sister did the same mistake (according to my family) of falling in love with a guy outside our community. She did an even bigger mistake by marrying the guy she loved going against the whole family. The day she had made that decision, she had been out cast from the family. Even after all these years it isn’t still forgotten or forgiven by some. Till date they think of it as a disgrace on our family. This incident should have made me think a lot before getting committed for life. But I dint. I went with what my heart wanted… HIM. And also I thought things would change with times but they dint. I dread the day this truth comes out… those days will be the worst days of my life.

Now I was facing most crucial questions of my life –

Him or Family?

Life time of happiness or Pride?

Or would things be different in my case?

I look up that sky, hoping that the answers were out there… somewhere. But the sky seems to be giving me the same answer like always, ‘It’s your life and your decision. Nobody else can make it for you. Only you can live your life’.

PS- This is a work of fiction and I hope its treated that way :).

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  1. It was relief I felt… when I read the Post Script! No one, not even my worst enenmy should ever have to face such a dilemma I feel, divided by caste or community… education, upbringing I understand but not this! Mostly love is such a misused concept and term, that the real thing gets shrouded by the not-required petty things, and inane things that hurt……..

    And I do hope with all my heart that your P.S. are not like mine……………

  2. interesting topic..I would go with the guy if I am sure about my feelings for him..no doubt parents brought us up; but we have to spend next 50 odd years (assuming I am gonna live ling :P) with that guy..parents do come around..rarest of the rare case where they do not understand you..their society is more important than ur happiness; but is that right? if you are wrong as you are going against them; then ain’t they wrong in not supporting you in something that is going to make you happy forever?

    My personal opinion 🙂

  3. you have a different yet unique way to say it all!

    yes indeed family it should be –
    i dont think anything overtakes the grounds we are born and brought up on 🙂

    rest obviously are just wise words or the wise which lead us to believe that love should conquer all!

  4. This post was beautifully written different from what you usually do…
    Choosing over family and love will suck anyday…


  5. totally agree with Neha

    It’s an important topic and I hope parents get over their hang-ups about caste and community. I am going through hell because of astrology. You know me and rish are not a good match according to “astrology” and these readings declare us wrong for each other.. HARMFUL of all the things. How can one harm someone they love?

    anyway, lol.. i could identify with this girl in your story, I have sleepless nights, slept at 6.30 this morning 🙂

  6. tough choice but fiction naa…let the story hv tht ending.. . 🙂 😉

  7. A turmoil is something than creates a dent in the universe. 🙂

    Good way of writing it…tot wud like to know wot the girl chose…:)

  8. And with the girl…i mean the author…:)

  9. That is so beautifully written. One can never choose betwn Family and love. Its like ripping apart the heart into two. Well penned.

  10. Lovely post..loved the way you wrote it.

    P.S: Loved the pic..perfect for yr stry..kidhar se milte hain tumhe yea awesome pics??

  11. well written…n i figured its fiction even before i read the PS 🙂

  12. You’re one fantastic writer, wow brilliant

  13. Babe these are absolutely circumstantial..usually we say parents are never wrong but sometimes maybe they are ruled by prejudices…but well written girl..m sure so many people would relate to this one

  14. Love this. Especially the disclaimer 🙂 Definitely taken as such! And it is beautifully written.

  15. Intriguing topic.

    I’ll try my best to find a middle ground if that happens to me. I’m not one for leaving my family that fast just to be with a man. Family is always a priority to me.

  16. Beautiful narration to an intriguing tale 😀

    Loved the layout of your blog and the picture you added to this post.

    Keep up the good work 🙂


  17. I guess it’s hard having to choose love over family, but sometimes family needs to be put back and you give love a chance. I can relate to this, since my girl is in a similar situation 🙂

  18. Beautifully written.
    It was such a relief to read the PS at the bottom.

  19. is this really a fiction….Sounds so real… 😛

  20. Every fiction story is a reality some where in this world and the story above is real in ma lyf….with ma gal…nd im waitn for her decision…..happiness or pride….love or family….me or her dad..lets c wat happens

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